the day my mind left me i had one of them attack again.this one was a little bit longer.lasted ard 20 minutes.20 farkin minutes.started innocently enuff.was sittin ard at werk doing nuthin when it suddenly hit me.this feeling of self-loathing.feeling that im never gonna amount to anymore than this.feelin so unappreciated.and this really totally freaked me out.went to the toilet to wash my face,to cleanse my thoughts.didnt really help much.still felt miserable.started to walk.not really sure where to.just knew had to get away from everything.went into every shop in jp.not browsing not buying.just walkin in and out.pace quickened(not sure for what)and then the peak of my manic depression.my eyes started to well up.wiped it off quickly to maintain sum dignity.or watevers left of it.then the odd sniffs.faked a cough to make it look normal.went back to the projectionist room becos i didnt want anybody to see my red eyes.tried to put on watever cd i cud find to ease my mind.black sabbath was the only one i cud find.hmmm...good old ozzy...."people think i'm insane because i am frowning all the time"........."tell a joke and i will sigh and u will laugh and i will cry"........and as soon as it came,it was suddenly over.at peace with myself again.felt longer than 20 minutes.felt emotionally drained.hoping it doesnt come again soon.*crosses finger*